Some idiot drives to a town with bad weather and sticks his hand down the toilet to find his dead wife
Some fucking nerd is in a movie theater and his bitchy ass girlfriend gets stolen by some asshole. Then the nerd gets pulled into the movie world and fights shit in spandex.
An elf in a green shirt runs around with a lame fairy trying to get a mask back from some scarecrow.
some asshole wastes all her money on an aquarium and then fucks an alien. and then she gets killed by a holographic child.
some little assholes go to camp and earn merit badges
these a big haired dude, a girl in parachute pants and a weird cat midget try to save the world from a giant tree or something
there’s apparently some kind of alien terrorist blowing up planets so you shoot blocks back at them and become the supreme alien terrorist in their spot
Some bitch stole Spring so all the other bitches go after her to get it back. And bitch at each other.
This blonde little shit who’s basically shirtless the entire game (kid runs through snow, what the shit is that?!) teams up with some piss poor pirates, a former princess, some buff guy who’s identical twin brother is apparently one of the bad guys, and his girlfriend or whatever the fuck. I don’t even know why that kid’s there. Something about sky pirates, I dunno.
pot-breaking vandal collects some shitty masks in three days
Some anime-lookin’ little shit goes through different Disney-themed levels fighting black blobs using a giant key. His sidekicks are Dolan and Gooby and his best friend turns evil or something? I dunno, they lost me at “Disney”. Oh, and his girlfriend is voiced by the cheerleader from Heroes. Like anyone cares about that anymore.
Modern Warfare.
a really terrible husband and father in the american west gets tricked into going to mexico after befriending a drunk, a grandfather, an ancient con artist, and a couple of retards.
Some fucktard, rich cunt orphan dressed as an animal goes to a shitty little prison city and fucks up the normal lives of everyone there.
You tell people when to do basic shit, like eat and poop. Then they eventually die.
you play as some green wussy dinosaur carrying an Italian wussy plumber baby on your back who cries up a shit storm if he falls off while you swallow bad guys and shit out eggs and throw those shit eggs at other bad guys.
(Source: effyeahpegasister)
Moving Out.
Today I am moving all of the stuff out of the bachelor pad I’ve called home for the past two years. It would be nice to have friends with bigger cars than mine help out, but thankfully a saint of a friend has a saint of a truck he can help with soon. As much as I’ll miss this place, I won’t be missing the thin walls and shaky floors whenever someone walks outside. No those aren’t deep-ass metaphors for love either.
